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June 4, 2011 at 2:02 pm #37464adelParticipant
I have been practicing
bone breathing in the
ocean lately. Standing in
neck deep or just floating
up and looking at the sky.
I have a lot of resistance
to breathing air so this
breathing in of water is
so much easier. Recently
I have taken a lot of my
practices into the sea,
the deep healing is especially
good there. Yesterday I had
pelicans and birds diving
all around me, fish nibbling
on my heels, and my favorite
of all, a little turtle swim
by me. Sometimes I feel so
calm underwater that I
dont need to breathe at all,
I can breathe in the water…
sounds weird.I had taken a break from the
fusion and gone back to doing
the orbit prac, bone breathing,
tendon stretching, and other
fund practices. I am starting
to feel strong enough to continue
with the fusion again. I had come
to a point where I realized how
so many people (close family too)
were not really looking at me for
me but were communicating with me
thru their own emotional feelings
that had little to do with me.
I realized that I had been deceiving
myself in thinking that people loved
me and had my best in their hearts,
it was quite shattering to see the
truth and I had to step away from
the fusion until I felt strong
enough to be alone and for it to
be enough just for me myself alone
to love me. sorry to jabber….Best to all,
AdelJune 4, 2011 at 3:49 pm #37465milletParticipantHi adel,
If you permit, I will just give you my two cents about your important and genuine realization.
Indeed, people most of the time love others thought their own emotional projections. Please don’t jump to conclusions: you may include yourself into these people (do *you* really love people in another way than through emotional projections?), and this is part of life’s process until you discover it and question it which you do.Everyone love others and even oneself through projection. Love without projection (or the most sane ones) comes after a lot of work which you seem to have the courage to undertake.
I would not question the love people have for you even if it is through projections because they won’t do it differently until they can, and until they see that these projections act as a barrier for real love between them and you.
Keep up the good work, be *patient* and *loving* with you and them. The work you do on/with yourself will have some effects on them one way or another.
take care,
milletJune 5, 2011 at 1:55 am #37467user244075ParticipantThanks for sharing your experience. I haven’t practiced ocean breathing yet in the ocean, have you tried it?
June 5, 2011 at 1:18 pm #37469adelParticipantIt takes a bit of time to get on
the same cycle as the movement
of the current and waves, but if
you can really become passive and let
the sea breathe for you, it feels
as if it could go on forever.Adel
June 5, 2011 at 1:27 pm #37471adelParticipantyes, there is no getting away from projections. But I think what
hit me was it being my mother using me in the same ways since
I was a child. Where I had always taken it as being my fault, this
time I could see the manipulations (the same since childhood) being
taken to protect herself at her child’s expense. A lot has to do
with me living in Asia so long with a child and family come first
value but also the fusion practice has really brought out some deep
truths that I had been unable to express previously.Thanks millet,
AdelJune 8, 2011 at 12:10 pm #37473StevenModerator>>>I have been practicing
>>>bone breathing in the
>>>ocean lately. Standing in
>>>neck deep or just floating
>>>up and looking at the sky.Sounds marvelous. 😉
>>>I have a lot of resistance
>>>to breathing air so this
>>>breathing in of water is
>>>so much easier.I’d encourage you to explore
deeper this “resistance to
breathing air”. I think
there are probably some issues
behind this that are worth
exploring . . . getting in
touch deeper with your lung spirit.
I suspect metal-wood tension.>>>Sometimes I feel so
>>>calm underwater that I
>>>dont need to breathe at all,
>>>I can breathe in the water…
>>>sounds weird.Not weird at all.
I’ve experienced this myself.>>>I had come
>>>to a point where I realized how
>>>so many people (close family too)
>>>were not really looking at me for
>>>me but were communicating with me
>>>thru their own emotional feelings
>>>that had little to do with me.
>>>I realized that I had been deceiving
>>>myself in thinking that people loved
>>>me and had my best in their hearts,
>>>it was quite shattering to see the
>>>truth and I had to step away from
>>>the fusion until I felt strong
>>>enough to be alone and for it to
>>>be enough just for me myself alone
>>>to love me.Practice is often about gaining deeper
insight into yourself and to see patterns
of behavior you didn’t observe before.
This new awareness can be shocking, and
can cause a new alignment in your thinking.
It can be hard.At the same time, it often becomes clear that
these patterns were always there and on some
subconscious level, you were always aware of
them, but now you are forced to face it directly.>>>sorry to jabber….
actually, it’s great to hear your sharings . . .
My best to your practice,
StevenJune 9, 2011 at 11:03 pm #37475Michael WinnKeymasterAdel,
I spend 7 weeks every winter in the Caribbean, and try almost all my internal practices out in the ocean. Too many to enumerate here. But you can “breathe” any element directly, not just water.
enjoy
michaelJune 12, 2011 at 2:01 pm #37477adelParticipantThanks for your insights, Steven.
..I’d encourage you to explore
.. deeper this “resistance to
..breathing air”. I think
..there are probably some issues
..behind this that are worth
..exploring . . . getting in
..touch deeper with your lung spirit.
..I suspect metal-wood tension.This advice is most interesting to me, I
actually have started working a little more
with Po than I had previously been able to.
All of the movements become very tight and
restricted but I know I have to continue. In
contrast I have a very loving feeling for
Hun. When I dance with Hun, it is fluid and
comfortable, we can speak truths to each
other. I feel a deep love for Hun and I feel
I need to hide from Po. ahhhhhhhhh..At the same time, it often becomes clear that
..these patterns were always there and on some
..subconscious level, you were always aware of
..them, but now you are forced to face it directly.You are right, I always instinctively know the
truth and act as if I don’t…then when it comes
out I wallow in the pain, playing the victim.
Not the kind of person that I want to be.
Many thanks for the wake up.Best to all of you, wish I were at a retreat
this year… hopefully next summer.
AdelJune 12, 2011 at 10:09 pm #37479StevenModerator>>>This advice is most interesting to me, I
>>>actually have started working a little more
>>>with Po than I had previously been able to.
>>>All of the movements become very tight and
>>>restricted but I know I have to continue. In
>>>contrast I have a very loving feeling for
>>>Hun. When I dance with Hun, it is fluid and
>>>comfortable, we can speak truths to each
>>>other. I feel a deep love for Hun and I feel
>>>I need to hide from Po. ahhhhhhhhhWhich movements are you doing?
S
June 16, 2011 at 1:58 pm #37481adelParticipantThe movements I do to with Po
are:I start out with a total
skin brushing (using a brush
made of white horse hair), then
breathe white thru my skin.
Once skin feels open I then go
on to clearing out with the Lung
healing sound movement whereupon
I start to tense up so I go on to
the part of fund 2 breathing chi
kung where I cross my hands over
the middle channel and bring the
white pearl up and down, passing
it thru the diaphram while focusing
on the softening of the movements.Then I will do bone breathing, etc..
until I work up to the fusion. During
fusion, when I look down to the the
water pearl I often see the white
pearl sharing the same space. I don’t
quite understand why yet, but I think
the more fusion I do the more I will
be able to feel and see po.It is funny, I never even thought
about my liver until I starting doing
Michael’s dvd. And then it was like
meeting a long lost lover. When I
sit in with Hun, I feel as if I am
in a Shrine made of beautiful wood,
totally open to the deep green of
the surrounding mossy garden. A place
where anyone can come for refuge yet
Hun does not have to actively do any-
thing, just be there. After times that
I am angry, I feel a huge respect for
Hun for being so honest and strong.
As for po, I’ll have moments of connection
but they are fleeting. Sometimes I think
if I could just cry all day it would
clear up but even crying doesn’t help,
it just feels stuck.Thanks for listening,
Adel.
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