May 17, 2006 at 3:23 am #14122
The expression is: “the pot calling the kettle black.”
I am back now after an excellent three days talking with trees, rocks, birds and hot water who told me I am fine the way I am and didn’t want to slap me any number of times.
Your refreshing response to Fajin regarding our conversations was compassionate and accurate. You’re right, he thinks he has it all figured out and he’s barely just begun. He can’t really hear what we are saying. He is too defended. He talks about wanting to see new perspectives but really he doesn’t want to…yet. Anyway, enough about him.
Where are you? Are you friends with Wendy?
What did you think of what Pietro said about lust and love?
-AlexanderMay 17, 2006 at 3:48 am #14123
I agree with Pietro on lust and love and think that what he said was magnificent (compliments). I am sorry if I meant any disrespect to you, it was not my intent. Like Max, I may be harsh with my words and it tends to make discussions a little tense.
I may have disagreed with what you said about me, but that doesn’t mean that I am not open to new perspectives. As a matter of fact, if you looked at my “Question for Bagua” post, you would find that I am open to new perspectives. You may explore with me anytime you want, but don’t expect me to agree with what you say.
I am a believer in self-exploration as the highest exploration and I am not always open to others views about me. Wendy and I have come to agreement about this. I could write an essay and a half about Wendy’s character and traits, but decide to keep them to myself. Wendy too is free to express her feelings about me as a person, but does not anymore.
I hope that you didn’t take my words to heart, I didn’t mean to cause any hurt.
FajinMay 17, 2006 at 6:25 am #14125
I am glad you didn’t get slapped around on your mini-break 🙂
Let’s see – I am friends with Wendy but have only conversed with her online.
Pietro’s post on lust and love I haven’t really digested at the moment. Intellectually, I can understand much of what he is saying but I have yet to synthesize it further to get my own feeling about it.
Maybe I can get back to you on this?
EmelgeeMay 18, 2006 at 12:32 am #14127
Thanks for your concern about my wellbeing. I am fine. I bounce.
At first, Fajin, I was offering my observations to you (and less directly to Bagua, to help the universe “tweak” you. (Mat has attempted twice to point this out.) But when it escalated so quickly and intensely, I saw the opportunity to use it for myself to an extent I had not foreseen and began to use our “talks” to tweak myself. It has proven to be extremely valuable to me. That’s why I thanked you for your time at the end of one of my messages.
As far as the mirror analogy people have been using- One of the few absolute truths I know is that we can NOT do it all ourselves, we are definitely not our own best mirrors much of the time, and it is self-delusion to believe so. We need each other. You can argue this point till the Canadian cows come home and it won’t do anything but make me smile to you.
I would like to make this really really clear: I do not find anything “wrong” with you. Nothing is “wrong” with any of us. But we are having these conversations to encounter one another and in doing so to encounter ourselves and grow. We are, after all, just One Big Self seeking to be whole and enjoy the beingness of it all. When we are open to hearing the observations other’s have about us -correct or incorrect, pleasant or detestable, made in love or in criticism- without having to react and defend ourselves, even, maybe, to enjoy them, we succeed in neutralizing the manipulative and confining forces of our egos and we become freer. This is a win-win situation, and it is our future.
When our opinions and reactions (essentially, when our thinking) overshadows our calmness and openness we get headstrong (strong in the head from too much believing that our opinions are the facts) and we fight. That’s when we lose the capacity to be in our right minds, to be clear and have perspective. This limits us. What “we” are trying to tell “you” when we are pointing things out to you (that you often seem to interpret as being told you are “wrong”) is that we see a way that we want to share with you that we feel will improve your personal experience. This “tweaks” you. Everyone needs tweaking. It is done in love. You don’t have to accept it. You don’t have to fight it off either. But you can if you want to, which is what, in my experience, you tend to do, when you hear something you don’t want to be told.
So- Enjoy the tweaking, if you can. Let it be alright with you.
Blessings, AlexanderMay 18, 2006 at 12:33 am #14129May 18, 2006 at 12:41 am #14131
Thank you for embarrassing me into self-realization, Pietro. That’s very kind of you. (smiling)
I am very interested in what women think about what you wrote. If they share those thoughts and feelings.
-AlexanderMay 18, 2006 at 1:00 am #14133
It’s nice to see that we can co-operate once again, especially after things go intense between us prior to your leaving for three days.
The thing is, I agree with Michael that our only teacher is the life force.
A teacher teaches and a student learns. We must learn by ourselves with our communication to the life force (don’t often use Michael’s terms, but it can’t hurt to try). It is through this personal experience that we evolve as human beings and learn to look within, that is the real mirror.
I think that discussions on the Healing Dao forum is great because we can share wisdom with one another just as the Daoist priests of the past had done, but each person is on their own journey and they must learn from the life force, this is self-help.
The link that connects each of us together is mutual respect for one another, ie. respecting each other for who they are. And this respect is also respecting the fact that each individual is self-responsible for who he is. By respecting this responsiblity in another person, we don’t point out what we think.
This is because we have come to the realization that this is for each individual to do for himself-herself. This is self-growth. If we can’t see ourselves in this way, then that is what we need to work on.
So what I’m trying to say is that we can constantly point out in another person what we think of them, but that is not being a teacher, that is expressing your thoughts, your opinions, what you think. This is not the way to help someone. If we want to help, we can do so by sharing our wisdom and insights.
All the Best,
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