Home › Forum Online Discussion › General › On Loving the Death of My Wife (Sent to eList Dec. 21)
- This topic has 55 replies, 11 voices, and was last updated 15 years, 10 months ago by Michael Winn.
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January 10, 2009 at 2:22 am #30030StevenModerator
>>>Such a demanding voice, Steven!
>>>You think you will hear anything when you scream like that?LOL.
Sorry, you got in the way of the tiger’s roar (my Chinese animal).
He comes out from time to time when he feels like he’s been ignored. ๐S
January 10, 2009 at 11:02 am #30032DogParticipantOk straight talk. This is an internal issue thats why I say some aspects of your self can get out voted. Life force god in neutral. Your soul heart-mind and body need to get together and talk about what is best. What serves you and most importantly life, they can find common ground I feel. God gets blamed allot but it is peoples souls that mainly decided a path while in the early heaven state, and most decide to ride it out mainly blaming or praising god for there destiny. Life does not start at birth. Thats my straight to cents.
January 10, 2009 at 12:44 pm #30034baguaParticipantHello Steven:
It is my experience the fundamental objective in Taoist Cultivation and most spiritual practices is having a clarity of what we are, in knowing this most all our concerns based in false understandings are resolved. In knowing this we are more able to live a happier more meaningful life. Creator and creation are one, when this is clearly known you will know your essential nature. In my view many of your questions can only be known when you truly know your fundamental nature, Nei Gong should reveal this. This is direct experience, not an intellectual understanding, with direct experience the intellect will follow this experience, you will think from that space.
From my view having a clarity of what you are is more important than living to an old age, because you will know you are an eternal being and the amount of time in this form is not important because it is not the beginning or the end, true freedom occurs.
The quality of life is the key, cultivation should bring about an enormous change in the quality of life.
Genetics and early lifestyle are probably common reasons for the illnesses, and many come to healing tao and other traditions because they are ill and seeking ways to heal, possibly their lives were extended because of the practice.
Thousands of people practice tao qi gong and nei gong, the people you maybe referring to represent a minute percentage.
Healing Tao is about direct experience from practice, we dont really try to sell anything much. We hope people will practice the basics and then if they feel a benefit they will incorporate them into their lifestyle and if they benefit they can continue, there should be no pressure placed on people, just make it available, if they come great. In my view too many promises are made in the alchemy, too many fantasies. I encourage all to read Tao Te Ching and just try to understand the simple words, not convert it to grand ideas, and it can guide us in a simple and profound way.
I am not sure what high level means, knowing all the formulas and knowing theories is not necessary high level achievement, how our cultivation effects our life, the way we live day to day, the way we treat and communicate with others are reflective of our cultivation and achievement.
Our attachment to everything but our true nature lead to many questions and concerns, they are rooted in a false attachment to what we are not. Knowing our essential nature will cause most of these questions/concerns to dissolve, the underlying mechanism is not longer viewed as valid.
In tao we dont compare ourselves to others, if we do it is an endless cycle that cannot be controlled, Lao Zi is clear about this.
I suggest trying to practice Nei Gong without to much theory for a period, just do the practices and allow the integration of you and the cosmos to mingle and in this process you will know who you are and most of your questions will be answered, and you will giggle to your self.
Ba Gua
January 10, 2009 at 1:10 pm #30036Patrick McLeodParticipantSerious issues are the ones which need silliness most, to balance them along the serious-silly axis of polarity. ๐
But you suggest to yourself, unbeknownst to yourself, an excellent practice for increasing your skill at and understanding of the art of longevity: consult an expert. Namely, a being who has managed to live on earth in a body for millions of years, more precisely, a rock.
Meditate with a rock on the topic of earthly longevity. You know, ask it questions and wait patiently…very… very… patiently, for a response. ๐
You might also visit a nearby ornithological museum and ask one of those arctic terns who spend most of their time in the air, migrating thousands of miles just for better food and more sex, how they manage to stay in a body. I mean, they rarely even touch the earth and they live for at least a decade!
Between a bird and a petrified turd, perhaps you can find the deep spiritual insights you seek.
Yours in mortal solidarity (solidity?),
Patrick
January 10, 2009 at 1:18 pm #30038Michael WinnKeymasterSteven,
I thought your question is legitimate exploration of the relationship between mind and soul.The answers given to you are all correct in that they are saying, “well, explore this for yourself, it’s not a theoretical issue, what do you want ot create?”.
But we can discuss it beyond that level. I believe the fundamental purpose of alchemy is to speed up the deepening of this mind-soul relationship. Mind here means xin, heart-mind, or body-mind in western lingo.
But speeding it up, or gaining deeper completion, doesn’t imply ENDING either the mind nor the soul as if they were a finite “thing” or had a fixed lifespan. They are both just processes. Deathof a pattern doesn’t have to mean death of a body. But using your astrology chart as one definition of a soul pattern, we could answer your question this way:
Once I’ve completed my destiny or mission of my original chart/pattern, I can choose to take on new patterns, both at the mind and soul levels. Or those patterns will be spontaneously “offered” to me by the Tao….
This is just another way of saying that all Tao process is infinitely deep, and whether it happens at the physical level or in some other dimension will depend on will and level of skill/integrity.
this is why I went to some length to explain that Joyce (my “spirit-wife”) developed an irreconcialble conflict between her heart mind and her soul. Once the soul decides to leave, the mind losses its voting rights.
There is nothing to be ashamed of in talking about this with students – just explain that there are many levels of “self” involved in free will, personality is smallest of them, even as it is the one with the most leverage, i.e. it is where the soul rubber meets the road/matter.
Both are essential to the free will/love process. But a conscious car would not mistake its tires for its engine, would it?
peace,
MichaelJanuary 10, 2009 at 1:21 pm #30040Alexander AlexisParticipantHi Steven,
I didn’t take it personally. I was referring to the aspect of you that is making the demand as not being receptive.
That voice is not You and it cannot be answered. Voices like that are a part of ego that feels separated from source and is trying to use mind to get free by controlling things. It is the mind inside itself doing the game of “I can’t get out!” You are not the mind you have.
What catches my attention about your original question, and what you say that follows, is the insistence of trying to use the mind to find out what life is all about and in the process missing the wisdom of Julian’s video message. I say you missed it because it seems to me that the tone of your response to him about it suggested that not being mental (controlling, in this case) was being irresponsible. It is actually letting go of that that will provide the answer you really want. (Which is what Bagua is trying to convey to you in his beautiful messages.)
In my experience, my questions do not get answered the way I insist they be – with words and in a way I can “use” them to control/change/understand a situation to my liking. This is not what our lives are about. Ultimately, things change to harmony by releasing control in any of its subtle forms. It is the ego/mind trying to stay in charge that has produced most of our responses to things and, as such, has turned, for instance, science into profit-making technology.
We are not actually doing any of this healing. That’s the perspective of the ego in separation. Healing, itself, is not even actually occurring because there is no separation to begin with that could manifest as a problem needing to be healed. That’s why this reality is often referred to as an illusion. It’s actually a de-lusion to see the world this way.
We are remembering that we are part of the Oneness which knows itself to be complete. When we identify with our minds or other “things” we are choosing to forget what we are (Bagua’s point too) and pretending that we are victims of the world around us and need something. “Returning” in Daoism means returning to our original knowing of what we are thus neutralizing all the distractions and struggles emanating from our ego-centered thoughts.
So my real point here is to notice that:
a- You are not your thinking or even the thinker -the one who is asking the questions.
b- You don’t need to know what you are trying to find out in order to actually bring about positive change
c- Bagua’s original point about trusting is where it’s at:But is can be your intellect or yi in fear that its days of delusion are over.
And here, where he says in his last post:
Our attachment to everything but our true nature lead to many questions and concerns, they are rooted in a false attachment to what we are not. Knowing our essential nature will cause most of these questions/concerns to dissolve, the underlying mechanism is not longer viewed as valid.
…I suggest trying to practice Nei Gong without to much theory for a period, just do the practices and allow the integration of you and the cosmos to mingle and in this process you will know who you are and most of your questions will be answered, and you will giggle to your self.
Is this coming through?
Best,
AJanuary 10, 2009 at 1:26 pm #30042Alexander AlexisParticipantJanuary 10, 2009 at 1:27 pm #30044Alexander AlexisParticipantJanuary 10, 2009 at 2:17 pm #30046StevenModeratorHi Michael,
I just wanted to let you know (firstly) that I meant
no disrespect whatsoever to you or Joyce.In fact, I was profoundly moved by her life story
and also by your different heartfelt
spiritual stories regarding her transition!My motivation here comes because after her death,
the death of Ron Diana two years before, etc., people speak
in whispers. Then people ask me in private moments
when senior instructors are not present, things
like “Why are so many high level practitioners dying
of cancer at a relatively early age? Shouldn’t
they be the ones most skilled in the practices?
Are they doing something wrong?”Not many people are willing to ask these things
openly, because they don’t want to appear as
insensitive.Then you’ve also mentioned something about
“excess fire practices” causing cancer by
creating situations the body couldn’t handle.All of these things put together made me feel
that there was something that needed to be
discussed here . . .But again, I meant absolutely no disrespect whatsoever.
Best always,
StevenJanuary 10, 2009 at 2:24 pm #30048Patrick McLeodParticipantFor a good example of how NOT to attempt this renewing of the earthly contract, observe the strategy of fictional villain “Vigo the Carpathian” in the educational documentary Ghostbusters 2.
January 10, 2009 at 2:25 pm #30050StevenModeratorHi Michael,
I appreciate your taking the time
to respond to my question.It appears that the underlying issue
in these situations is a conflict
or friction between “what the soul wants”
and “what the mind wants”.Perhaps working to bring these disparate
elements into alignment also helps to
strengthen inner will and free choice?Interesting discussion; thank you!
Steven
January 10, 2009 at 2:27 pm #30052StevenModeratorI don’t think I’ve laughed that hard in a long time!
Smiles to you . . .January 10, 2009 at 2:30 pm #30054StevenModeratorJanuary 10, 2009 at 2:39 pm #30056StevenModerator>>>From my view having a clarity of what you are
>>>is more important than living to an old age,
>>>because you will know you are an eternal being
>>>and the amount of time in this form is not important
>>>because it is not the beginning or the end, true
>>>freedom occurs.Of course, this is up for debate.
I’ve also heard that belief in the HT, that
when you die, if you have not lived long enough to
do all of the internal alchemy techniques to integrate,
then your shen scatter after death.The shen team form your “self”, and thus while the
shen live on (possibly forming new teams to reincarnate),
you do NOT live on . . . because “you” is only defined
by the assemblage of the team that no longer exists.In other words, you cease to be and are recycled.
S
January 10, 2009 at 2:55 pm #30058StevenModeratorHi Alexander,
I think you misinterpreted my response to Julian’s video
clip though. The question of “are these practices dangerous” and/or
“are these practices really *effective* for health” are concrete ones that
don’t have anything to do with “understanding the self”.I agree with everything you wrote, but it seemed like you
were answering a different question (superbly I might add) than
what I really had in mind. Hopefully I clarified myself through
subsequent posts.Smiles,
Steven -
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