Quarantine Humor (You need to laugh to survive this pandemic)

*   Still haven’t decided where to go for Easter —– The Living Room or The Bedroom

*   PSA: every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pajamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom.

*   Homeschooling is going well. 2 students suspended for fighting and 1 teacher fired for drinking on the job.

*   I don’t think anyone expected that when we changed the clocks we’d go from Standard Time to the Twilight Zone

*   This morning I saw a neighbor talking to her cat. It was obvious she thought her cat understood her. I came into my house, told my dog….. we both laughed hysterically.

*   Quarantine Day 5: Went to this restaurant called THE KITCHEN. You have to gather all the ingredients and make your own meal. I have no clue how this place is still in business.

*   Day 5 of Homeschooling: One of these little monsters called in a bomb threat.

*   I’m so excited — it’s time to take out the garbage. What should I wear?

*   I hope the weather is good tomorrow for my trip to Puerto Backyarda. I’m getting tired of Los Livingroom.

*   Classified Ad: Single man with toilet paper seeks woman with hand sanitizer for good clean fun.

*   Day 6 of Homeschooling: My child just said “I hope I don’t have the same teacher next year”…. I was offended.

*   Better 6 feet apart than 6 feet under

*  If you receive an e-mail titled KNOCK, KNOCK!!   Don’t open it, it’s Jehovah Witnesses working from home.

*   REMEMBER, NO STORM LASTS FOREVER.

– Roberta Tipp