Sexual frustration: PRACTICAL solutions?

Hi SD,

You mention that you are interested in, but don’t know much about his
stuff. Have you purchased any of his DVDs or CD’s? Certain things
I think are easier to learn this way than from a book . . . kind of
something I would consider halfway between a book and actually learning
live.

Thanks for your insight into the benefits of learning HL without
a partner. I have a question. You mention that you do a practice
of 100 days without ejaculation. What do you mean by this exactly?
Do you mean that you actually don’t release ANY fluid for 100 days,
or just that you don’t masturbate/masturbate to orgasm for 100 days?

At least for me, if I go any more than a week without releasing
via some sexual stimulation, it comes out in my sleep–i.e. wake
up with messy underwear in the morning.

. . . or is it that the practice somehow stops “noctural emissions”,
i.e. releasing in your sleep?

Regarding the meaning of your dreams, I don’t really have insight.
The best I could guess is that your mind is representing the
quantity of stored sexual energy symbolically by a big penis.
Of course, that’s just a complete random guess. You would
probably intuitively know more about it than I could say.
I’ll also leave it to others to discuss possible psychological
effects of practice as I don’t have sufficient background.

Best,
Steven

I would classify an addiction as something that
you do regularly, have difficulty stopping, and
have extreme discomfort if you do stop.

Three cups of coffee in a week doesn’t sound like
a lot to me, but then again only you would know if
it is an addiction or not.

As for me, I used to have several addictions–caffeine
being one of them for instance, but I have
eliminated all of them except for one–namely smoking,
since it is tied in with the intestinal problem
that I’ve discussed previously on this list.

As for caffeine, after I did get rid of the addiction,
I did notice that I actually had more energy after
I was off of it, then when I was on it. In fact,
when I was heavily addicted, I would be tired and
caffeine would have little effect in making me *less*
tired. I could have caffeine and go right to sleep
with no problem.

Since you’ve mentioned you also have problems with
fatigue, if you did manage to stop using it, you
could possibly have more energy. At least, I
found it to be the case for me.

Of course, as I mentioned in the previous post, I
don’t think it absolutely necessary to try to get
rid of an addiction, as it may be providing some
purpose–and when the purpose has been completed, or
you find a better way to accomplish the same thing,
then the addiction will fall away on its own.

Steven

Hi SD,

Yeah, in your case, I’d recommend avoiding it.

However, don’t beat yourself up too much because you
started going back to it. You’re only human. If you
quit again, so be it, but don’t attack yourself so
much for things that you do.

Sometimes we put such high demands on ourselves and
beat ourselves up so much over “mistakes” that that
is a problem in itself. You can tire yourself out
just from personal criticism! Just try to forget
the past and live in the present. Besides progress
is rarely straight up. It’s more like back and forth
with an overall drift upward.

As to being fatigued for studies, I can sympathize.
After putting in a day on campus, I rarely feel like
I can get any actual work done in the evening. One
somewhat “bizarre” solution that seems to work is
as follows:

1. I get up in the morning.
2. I go in to campus.
3. I come home in the afternoon.
4. Late afternoon/early evening, I go to sleep because I’m tired.
5. I sleep for about 3 hours.
6. I wake up feeling refreshed and invigorated.
7. I have energy to study, and I study for several hours!
8. I then go to bed around 2-3am or so.
9. I get up the next morning at 8am.
10. Because I had slept earlier in the evening,
I don’t wake up overly tired and exhausted at 8am
(even if I want to sleep more).
11. I go back into campus, come home in the afternoon, and repeat.

I personally find I get a lot more done this way.
If I try to get a full night’s sleep in one session, then
sure I will wake up refreshed in the morning, but then even
though I might not be as sleepy at 4pm, I still can’t
get much done in the evening because I’m too fatigued.

I don’t know. It might be something to consider.

The bottom line is this. If you are tired, instead of
trying to force yourself to study or whatever, just
go to sleep! Listen to your body. Set an alarm and
wake up a few hours later, and you will feel recharged
to be able to study.

Best,
Steven

Hey Dog!

You must really have a bright personality, because I can
rarely read one of your posts without a big smile on my face!

Actually, I went back and read the post you were responding
to, because I forgot what I had written there. It sounded
pretty depressive. Actually I’m usually pretty happy.

wendy must have hit some nerve or something . . . good job wendy!

At any rate, I think that there is quite a bit of truth to
what you wrote.

Thanks Dog.

Steve