Hey Barry, that was the first time I checked out the practice log thing. It sounds like you have gone through a lot of changes…being out of a long relationship can definitely shed some light on yourself. I am in the same boat, and it feels like I had developed a lot of compulsive patterns. Being with some people can either push you to grow and change or just tread water, I guess that’s part of the alchemy between people, and also shows the different parts of yourself.
Other people help to dislodge things you didn’t notice before.
Also, if you are in a loving relationship, you can start
to process things coming from the other person.
This is a great gift if you are free and clear; but if you have a
lot of crap yourself, it can make things more complicated,
and can make it harder.
So, Barry, I understand why it can be helpful to be alone, and
you’ve been able to settle more.
Also, I get the fear thing.
Fear is the place you go to learn.