Women joining in the table

It doesn’t make me happy at all Dog, the fact that you bring it up as something unique is sad. But of course I appreciate it that you do… because it resonates well with my journey.

Saying it is a hard lesson ‘learned’…. we are so so far from true healing.

The bimbo-culture in the west is another terrible mistake women are making, as result the pendulum is swaying to the other pole again of extreme ‘over’ protection of women, read: chains. Look at the ‘new movement’ in the US who are ‘protecting’ their daughters.
The more I go into this, the more depressed I become. No way how I toss and turn it, women are still at the very very beginning of the change.

I feel just very lucky to be born on this side of the planet.

Last night in dreamtime, I made a sound in my sleep, gathering wandering ghosts coming from everywhere, I guided them some down in the cellar some up to heaven. The most striking fragment of the dream was when other willing ghosts where helping muslim women to rise to heaven. They could not, they even took off their veils, and even so they could not lift themselves, even when other ghosts pulled them by the arms they could not rise. They were desperate because they felt trapped in between planes.
Today I feel very sad.

During a joined meditation just a little while ago one of the woman had a very similar ‘vision’, where the men where up in the sky, free, while the women where stuck in the earth, she saw a few strong women trying to pull out the stuck women but she felt really sad after the meditation for all those women trying to get out of the mud…. I did not tell a thing about my dream before the meditation….

During meditation yesterday I asked the same question, what can I do beside working within, how can I reach more women than I do now.

I often think do take on my old job as a nurse and work in the field, to some country where I can help out. I even checked the school for tropical medicine but then I’ve to think of my three daughters, they are women of the future too and I can’t leave them here on their own, at least not yet.
And even so, one person can only work in a very specific area in one specific country.
Even as a young girl I had a fascination for Florence Nightingale, she was my example, my idol sort of speaking. That is why I became a nurse in the first place.
To mother the wounds of those in pain.

So what else, I teach women yes, but the number of women is so little and the content is so specific I only reach the top layer of women who already are aware.

The answer that came up for now, is to write small booklets on very specific topics related to women, reachable and readable, to make them aware of their strengths and weakness.
During the cave meditation in China in 2002, we were given a little present by the monk, mine was a pen and I knew, and have always known that someday I had to write things down. My writing here on the forum are the bits and the pieces, the playground of my feelings and the try-out of something more substantial.

The first lines of the first booklet are already a fact…

Thanks for asking!

Thank you Barry, let me reply on your wise words.

How can we not be effected by the suffering of others, unless you close yourself for it, either because you have too much troubles yourself or you need to protect yourself from damage because of lack of earth.
My main target is to increase that earth in such a way that my body is a vessel for conscious transformation.

I find myself very lucky, as a result of this luck, there is no other way than being in service to others who are less lucky, otherwise this luck is a waiste.
I find it an inevitable response, the more inner happiness the more you offer.

But yes the more I take in the more solitary time I want to digest it. That is why the present situation is really good for me. It gives me the opportunity to take the necessary time and space to dive into it. I need separate dream time, my dreams are very different when having the bed for myself, I am very happy sleeping alone.

I dont like to teach any more in the evenings, because I want this time to be within myself, instead of being out, teaching. I am in a process of asking others to teach some of my classes so I have nearly every evening to myself.

And yes, it takes special care of the body. As a scorpio-snake I have to take care of the purification process of my body, it is the worst combination. I need to take special attention to release poisons out of my body, and I need to take care cooling the organs, as they tend to overheat when taking in too much poisons.

So yes, slowly and with care, but nevertheless inevitable I eat and digest the pain, hate, fear, anger and so many many tears. A human blender in service for as long as it takes.

And Barry as for your tears, I cried for 5 long years, until I had let go most of my pain and sorrow, like I had to let go not only the tears of this life but of many other. It was my first deep purification process from 16 till 21, I was overwhelmed by grieve and letting go of deep feelings of loneliness and separation.

I read your advice with care and I sense a loving care from it… I thank you for it